Hi there, it’s Jill!
Have you ever found yourself constantly reaching out to others, trying to learn about a new subject or seeking input, and then wondered: Am I being annoying?
It’s a common worry, especially when you’re new to a team or project. The good news is: there’s an art to asking a lot of questions while still earning respect and building strong relationships.
Here are four simple strategies I’ve learned to keep curiosity from crossing into annoyance:
Do homework first
Summarize questions clearly
Show appreciation and give credit
Offer help in return
Let’s dive in!
01
Do Homework First
It’s always better to ask than to stay stuck. But the first step is making sure you’re not asking something you could have easily figured out on your own.
If your question can be answered with a five-minute Google search, a quick scan of documentation, or even a thoughtful re-read of what’s already been shared, start there.
Other times, especially when you’re new to a project, you don’t even know where to start. In that case, it’s completely fine to ask a lot upfront. However, once you have a foundation, put in the work before circling back with follow-ups.
Doing adequate homework usually means:
Reviewing available documents
Running basic research or market checks
Talking to the teams or stakeholders mentioned earlier
Why does this matter?
It shows respect. People can see you value their time and are putting in effort on your side.
It deepens your understanding. By exploring first-hand, your next questions will be sharper, more targeted, and more productive.
The bonus? That very first impression — someone who’s proactive, thoughtful, and respectful of others’ time — creates trust. And that trust pays off in every future interaction.
02
Summarize Questions Clearly
Whether you’re asking by email, chat, or in a meeting, clarity is your best friend.
Write down your questions, group them logically, and rank them in order of importance. For example, you might organize them by:
Which team they involve
The sequence of dependencies
The type of resource needed
If you’re booking a meeting, consider sending your questions in advance. This gives the other person time to prepare and ensures the discussion runs smoothly.
A clearly documented list can sometimes even cut meeting time in half. I’ve seen 30-minute conversations shrink to 15 because both sides came in aligned. That clarity signals: I value your time, and I came prepared.
03
Show Appreciation & Give Credit
This one sounds obvious, but it’s amazing how far it goes.
Simple gestures — like a thank-you email, a shout-out during a team meeting, or using your company’s appreciation tools — can build goodwill and strengthen relationships.
And when a project wraps up? Don’t forget to spotlight the people who supported you. I once heard a colleague close her presentation with a line that stuck with me:
“The light that shines on me is just a reflection of the glow from each one of you who supported me in this journey. Thank you — your help was indispensable.”
That kind of public acknowledgment not only makes others feel valued, but also shows you as someone who uplifts those around you.
04
Offer to Help
Just because you’re new to a project doesn’t mean you have nothing to give back. Chances are, you bring unique skills, connections, or insights from your background that others don’t.
On the professional side, you might:
Share contacts from previous teams
Offer technical skills with tools or software
Provide slides design, writing, or storytelling input
On the personal side, you can also bring humanity to the relationship! Whether it’s restaurant recommendations, hobbies you bond over, or simply a listening ear.
Yes, you’re asking questions. But the relationship doesn’t have to feel transactional. By contributing where you can, you show you’re here to add value, not just take it.
Final Thoughts
Asking questions is one of the fastest ways to learn, but the way you ask makes all the difference.
When you:
✅ Do your homework,
✅ Prepare and summarize clearly,
✅ Express genuine gratitude, and
✅ Look for ways to give back…
…you transform from being “the person who always asks” to “the person everyone enjoys helping.”
So next time you feel hesitant about asking another question, go ahead! You’ll be surprised how much goodwill, and wisdom you will gain along the way.
— Jill
Founder of Anchor Growth Newsletter
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